1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:11,000 Sync by fant0m www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:12,225 --> 00:00:15,002 'Til Death is filmed in front of a live studio audience. 3 00:00:17,113 --> 00:00:20,331 Oh, my God! That was so much fun. 4 00:00:20,398 --> 00:00:23,312 Yeah. We looked at 18 wedding venues in 9 hours. 5 00:00:23,380 --> 00:00:28,061 I think I'm gonna go stick my head in the microwave and blast this day outta here. 6 00:00:28,129 --> 00:00:29,365 Sweetie, a little more support. 7 00:00:29,433 --> 00:00:30,801 Your only daughter's getting married. 8 00:00:30,869 --> 00:00:32,205 Honey, I'm being very supportive. 9 00:00:32,275 --> 00:00:34,577 I told I liked the first place we saw. 10 00:00:34,644 --> 00:00:36,746 That was walgreens. 11 00:00:36,814 --> 00:00:39,218 They had plenty of parking. 12 00:00:40,355 --> 00:00:42,089 You know what? You are always fine 13 00:00:42,156 --> 00:00:43,759 With the first thing that you see. 14 00:00:43,827 --> 00:00:47,498 Exactly. I mean, if I see something that's fine, I stop. 15 00:00:47,566 --> 00:00:50,068 That's how I chose this house and... 16 00:00:50,136 --> 00:00:52,171 This belt and... 17 00:00:52,239 --> 00:00:54,808 You, actually. 18 00:00:54,875 --> 00:00:57,311 I wonder if the belt and the house 19 00:00:57,379 --> 00:00:59,714 Cry in the bathroom as much as I do. 20 00:01:03,887 --> 00:01:05,055 Sorry about that. 21 00:01:05,123 --> 00:01:08,126 We were just, hangin' out in the car, 22 00:01:08,193 --> 00:01:10,457 Because, we needed a minute away 23 00:01:10,525 --> 00:01:12,122 From you. 24 00:01:12,189 --> 00:01:14,149 Ally, I was just telling your father 25 00:01:14,216 --> 00:01:15,579 How much we thought that the wedding 26 00:01:15,647 --> 00:01:17,214 Would be great at the old train station. 27 00:01:17,282 --> 00:01:18,549 We do? 28 00:01:18,617 --> 00:01:20,451 No. See, I don't think that we do. 29 00:01:20,519 --> 00:01:22,387 Oh, sure we do. Doug, tell her. 30 00:01:22,454 --> 00:01:25,390 Yeah, Doug. What do you think? Doug, tell her. 31 00:01:26,826 --> 00:01:28,793 Well... 32 00:01:28,861 --> 00:01:30,796 I didn't love the train station. 33 00:01:30,863 --> 00:01:35,868 And I don't... I don't think Allison liked it at all. 34 00:01:35,936 --> 00:01:38,170 And of course Mr. Stark 35 00:01:38,238 --> 00:01:40,640 Never saw it, because he was outside 36 00:01:40,708 --> 00:01:43,877 Busy trying to hit a yield sign with an orange. 37 00:01:43,945 --> 00:01:45,579 Well, I didn't hit the sign, 38 00:01:45,647 --> 00:01:48,182 But I got a jogger in the back pretty good. 39 00:01:48,249 --> 00:01:49,683 Here's the thing, you know. 40 00:01:49,751 --> 00:01:52,086 We all have opinions, and of course they're all valid, 41 00:01:52,153 --> 00:01:54,555 But I think there's one thing we can get behind 42 00:01:54,623 --> 00:01:55,990 Is I love the train station. 43 00:01:56,057 --> 00:01:59,326 Right, mom. I just thought since it was my wedding, 44 00:01:59,394 --> 00:02:01,962 I could have some say in something. 45 00:02:02,030 --> 00:02:04,999 Oh, honey, you do. You have say. Yeah. Now, I told you. 46 00:02:05,066 --> 00:02:07,735 You could pick the color of the trim of the invitation. 47 00:02:07,803 --> 00:02:10,838 As long as it's some shade of gold. 48 00:02:10,906 --> 00:02:14,008 Right. You did, and I picked the lava gold. 49 00:02:14,076 --> 00:02:15,443 Right. That didn't work. 50 00:02:15,511 --> 00:02:17,478 So I phoned the printer, 51 00:02:17,546 --> 00:02:20,381 And I told him what you really meant. 52 00:02:21,216 --> 00:02:22,850 Daddy. 53 00:02:22,918 --> 00:02:24,085 Please. 54 00:02:27,790 --> 00:02:29,324 Hey, man. You all right? 55 00:02:29,391 --> 00:02:30,625 I was takin' a nap, 56 00:02:30,693 --> 00:02:33,394 And I woke up, and I had, like, 30 texts from you. 57 00:02:33,462 --> 00:02:35,563 "help me. I'm dyin' here. 58 00:02:35,631 --> 00:02:39,500 Meet me in front of the liberty bell with a blunt object." 59 00:02:39,568 --> 00:02:43,204 Yeah, Joy was draggin' me around to all these wedding venues, 60 00:02:43,272 --> 00:02:47,041 And at a certain point, I realized that you were the only friend I had 61 00:02:47,109 --> 00:02:50,077 With hands strong enough to squeeze the life out of me. 62 00:02:51,446 --> 00:02:53,547 The wedding plans are in full swing. 63 00:02:53,615 --> 00:02:55,349 Love it! 64 00:02:55,417 --> 00:02:57,051 Let me ask you guys somethin'. 65 00:02:57,118 --> 00:02:59,253 You guys got someone to officiate the ceremony yet? 66 00:02:59,321 --> 00:03:00,387 No. Why? 67 00:03:00,455 --> 00:03:01,722 Well, thanks to the internet, 68 00:03:01,790 --> 00:03:03,257 I'm a fully ordained minister 69 00:03:03,325 --> 00:03:04,525 And certified scuba instructor, 70 00:03:04,592 --> 00:03:08,228 So I'll be happy to offer my services on land or sea. 71 00:03:10,431 --> 00:03:12,099 Thanks... thanks for that offer. 72 00:03:12,166 --> 00:03:17,437 My uncle's a pretty big bishop, so... 73 00:03:17,505 --> 00:03:20,607 You know, it's either you or him. 74 00:03:20,675 --> 00:03:24,444 Well, I'll just let you guys know that have done one, 75 00:03:24,512 --> 00:03:27,780 And although I did accidentally marry myself to the bride, 76 00:03:27,848 --> 00:03:29,749 It was magical. 77 00:03:35,122 --> 00:03:39,125 Babe, do you like these silver bamboo chairs for the wedding? 78 00:03:39,192 --> 00:03:40,392 Pull the trigger. 79 00:03:40,460 --> 00:03:42,795 Make all my dreams come true. 80 00:03:43,863 --> 00:03:46,798 Hey. Oh, do you think that we should put 81 00:03:46,866 --> 00:03:50,168 One of those, um, disposable cameras on all the tables? 82 00:03:50,236 --> 00:03:51,903 That's what the world needs, 83 00:03:51,971 --> 00:03:54,305 More pictures of your fat cousins. 84 00:03:54,373 --> 00:03:58,242 At least my cousins don't stay with us and wet our couch. 85 00:03:59,711 --> 00:04:04,780 Ok, so here is a tentative budget that I've come up with. 86 00:04:04,847 --> 00:04:07,214 Yeah. No. 87 00:04:07,281 --> 00:04:09,715 You can't just say no. 88 00:04:09,782 --> 00:04:12,516 Well, you've delivered your fair share of nos in this bed. 89 00:04:12,584 --> 00:04:14,051 I think I'm entitled to one. 90 00:04:14,119 --> 00:04:17,053 I'm sorry. I just assumed that you knew how much weddings cost. 91 00:04:17,121 --> 00:04:20,255 And I assumed you knew how very poor we were. 92 00:04:20,322 --> 00:04:23,123 Remember when that finance guy projected I could retire? 93 00:04:23,191 --> 00:04:24,124 At age 81. 94 00:04:24,192 --> 00:04:26,892 Come on. We do fine. 95 00:04:26,960 --> 00:04:29,494 Honey, just last week, you pointed at my paycheck, 96 00:04:29,562 --> 00:04:30,862 And you laughed out loud. 97 00:04:30,930 --> 00:04:33,097 Well, that's not because of the amount. 98 00:04:33,165 --> 00:04:34,398 It's just... 99 00:04:34,466 --> 00:04:38,101 I just laugh every time I see your middle name. I do. 100 00:04:38,169 --> 00:04:40,436 I will say it once again. 101 00:04:40,504 --> 00:04:43,739 Merrill can be a man's name. 102 00:04:43,806 --> 00:04:46,074 Eddie, this shouldn't come as a surprise to you. 103 00:04:46,142 --> 00:04:48,142 We've been discussing this wedding for weeks now. 104 00:04:48,210 --> 00:04:50,177 Come on, honey. Don't throw that at me. 105 00:04:50,245 --> 00:04:51,845 You know I don't listen. 106 00:04:52,714 --> 00:04:54,614 All right. All right, look. 107 00:04:54,682 --> 00:04:56,883 Let's once and for all get into this. 108 00:04:56,951 --> 00:04:58,785 You know I want Allison to have 109 00:04:58,852 --> 00:05:00,686 A great wedding, just like you do, 110 00:05:00,754 --> 00:05:01,787 But... this stuff here, 111 00:05:01,855 --> 00:05:04,289 We're not even in the... In the same ballpark. 112 00:05:04,356 --> 00:05:05,723 Well, what do you wanna do? 113 00:05:05,791 --> 00:05:07,592 Let's start with food. 114 00:05:07,659 --> 00:05:11,265 Oh, come on. Do we really have to feed these people? 115 00:05:11,333 --> 00:05:12,534 You better jump onboard here, 116 00:05:12,602 --> 00:05:14,737 'cause we only have one shot at this, 117 00:05:14,805 --> 00:05:16,872 And if Ally is anything like her mother, 118 00:05:16,940 --> 00:05:19,842 She is gonna be way too lazy to get a divorce. 119 00:05:42,983 --> 00:05:46,853 So much of you so close to my food. 120 00:05:46,920 --> 00:05:49,655 I'm just, looking for my midnight fiber, sir. 121 00:05:51,057 --> 00:05:52,057 Let's see... 122 00:05:52,125 --> 00:05:53,992 Is that what you wear to bed? 123 00:05:54,060 --> 00:05:56,661 Oh, no! I couldn't possibly sleep this restricted. 124 00:05:56,729 --> 00:06:00,631 I just, threw these on in case I ran into somebody. 125 00:06:00,698 --> 00:06:02,999 Thanks for the courtesy thong. 126 00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:07,500 Ah, slim pickings. 127 00:06:07,568 --> 00:06:10,303 Guess I'll just rock this bag of lettuce. 128 00:06:11,638 --> 00:06:14,239 You ok, sir? You seem a little tense. 129 00:06:14,307 --> 00:06:17,275 Ah, just all this wedding planning. 130 00:06:17,343 --> 00:06:19,444 Joy is just gettin' all nuts, 131 00:06:19,511 --> 00:06:21,646 and... 132 00:06:25,116 --> 00:06:27,818 Oh, this... This chair's cold. 133 00:06:29,721 --> 00:06:33,022 Yeah. It's drivin' Ally kind of crazy, too. 134 00:06:33,090 --> 00:06:36,759 Truth be told, I'm not here just for this crispy treat. 135 00:06:36,826 --> 00:06:39,294 I kind of had to take a break 136 00:06:39,361 --> 00:06:41,928 From all the scary anger and the hitting. 137 00:06:41,996 --> 00:06:46,266 So Allison's not too happy either, huh? 138 00:06:46,333 --> 00:06:48,134 No! Not... Not too happy. 139 00:06:50,370 --> 00:06:51,837 Well, listen, you have to remember, 140 00:06:51,905 --> 00:06:54,973 You know, Joy has a lot of ideas in her head, 141 00:06:55,041 --> 00:06:58,109 But this wedding is about you and Allison. 142 00:06:58,177 --> 00:07:00,378 Thank you, sir. I appreciate that. 143 00:07:00,445 --> 00:07:02,813 Absolutely. Now, of course I'm sure 144 00:07:02,881 --> 00:07:05,682 I'm a lot more spiritual than most, 145 00:07:05,750 --> 00:07:09,119 But, I believe that all this materialism 146 00:07:09,187 --> 00:07:11,888 And food and music 147 00:07:11,956 --> 00:07:15,525 And open bars that go into a wedding, 148 00:07:15,592 --> 00:07:20,496 I just... I just think it kind of takes away from the... 149 00:07:20,563 --> 00:07:22,897 All right, I'm just gonna say it. 150 00:07:22,965 --> 00:07:24,732 The love. 151 00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:27,534 Yeah. I mean, who needs, like, a... 152 00:07:27,602 --> 00:07:32,004 Ok, ok, ok. Let's keep 'em 10:00 and 2:00, ok? 153 00:07:32,072 --> 00:07:33,538 Sorry. 154 00:07:35,775 --> 00:07:37,375 Well, as I was saying, 155 00:07:37,443 --> 00:07:41,711 Who needs like, a... a huge ceremony with, like, a grand hall, 156 00:07:41,779 --> 00:07:43,713 When you could have, like... 157 00:07:43,780 --> 00:07:48,183 7 people and an ice-cream cake on my driveway is what I was... 158 00:07:48,251 --> 00:07:51,019 Well, I was thinkin' more along... 159 00:07:51,086 --> 00:07:54,121 Okay. Let's not get bogged down in the details, ok? 160 00:07:54,189 --> 00:07:55,890 That's unimportant. 161 00:07:55,958 --> 00:07:59,660 I mean, if you wanna... if you wanna have this disgusting display of wealth, 162 00:07:59,728 --> 00:08:01,361 Then go with Joy's idea. 163 00:08:01,429 --> 00:08:04,365 If not, let's just keep it simple. 164 00:08:04,432 --> 00:08:08,234 Yeah. I mean, when Allison and I 165 00:08:08,302 --> 00:08:10,903 First realized we were meant to be together, 166 00:08:10,971 --> 00:08:12,905 We were hiking in the poconos, 167 00:08:12,973 --> 00:08:14,840 And we found this great spot 168 00:08:14,908 --> 00:08:17,876 Called eagle rock, and that's where we first made love. 169 00:08:17,944 --> 00:08:19,877 And it was... 170 00:08:19,945 --> 00:08:21,378 It was so beautiful. 171 00:08:21,446 --> 00:08:23,046 It was so simple. 172 00:08:23,114 --> 00:08:24,714 And afterwards, a bluebird landed 173 00:08:24,782 --> 00:08:28,618 On the small of my back and chirped us a song. 174 00:08:33,056 --> 00:08:36,058 I'm gonna go to bed now. 175 00:08:40,797 --> 00:08:43,631 Edward merrill stark. 176 00:08:43,699 --> 00:08:45,133 Present. 177 00:08:46,268 --> 00:08:47,468 What did you do? 178 00:08:47,535 --> 00:08:49,503 Well, I'm... I'm gonna say nothin' 179 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:51,938 Until I know what you have on me. 180 00:08:52,006 --> 00:08:55,074 Doug and Allison have eloped. 181 00:08:55,141 --> 00:08:56,241 What? 182 00:08:56,309 --> 00:08:59,310 And I quote, "dear mom and dad, we've eloped. 183 00:08:59,378 --> 00:09:01,779 "we love you so very much, Doug and ali. 184 00:09:01,847 --> 00:09:03,381 P.S. Dad, you were right." 185 00:09:03,448 --> 00:09:05,483 What were you right about, Eddie? 186 00:09:06,918 --> 00:09:10,486 How my wife gets more beautiful every day. 187 00:09:10,554 --> 00:09:12,287 What did you do? You discussed with them 188 00:09:12,355 --> 00:09:15,490 How much you didn't wanna spend money on this wedding, didn't you? 189 00:09:16,392 --> 00:09:18,259 I... ok, look. 190 00:09:18,327 --> 00:09:19,560 First of... 191 00:09:19,628 --> 00:09:21,262 Uh, what? 192 00:09:21,329 --> 00:09:22,796 You did, didn't you? 193 00:09:22,864 --> 00:09:23,897 No. No, I... ok. Look. 194 00:09:23,965 --> 00:09:26,033 Maybe I did, but I can tell you 195 00:09:26,100 --> 00:09:27,901 I did not want them to elope. 196 00:09:27,969 --> 00:09:30,170 That is exactly what you wanted them to do. 197 00:09:30,238 --> 00:09:32,339 No. No, it isn't. I...I wanna be there. 198 00:09:32,407 --> 00:09:34,441 I...I wanna walk my daugher down the aisle. 199 00:09:34,509 --> 00:09:35,875 I just wanted it to be 200 00:09:35,943 --> 00:09:38,277 At one of philadelphia's lovely parks. 201 00:09:38,345 --> 00:09:40,345 Well, that is not for you to decide. 202 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:41,513 It is not your wedding. 203 00:09:41,580 --> 00:09:44,315 Oh, that's right. I forgot. It's yours. 204 00:09:44,383 --> 00:09:46,450 Oh, what the hell is that supposed to mean? 205 00:09:46,518 --> 00:09:48,485 Well, I could tell you what the hell it means. 206 00:09:48,553 --> 00:09:52,155 The kids do not want to get married at a... at a train station 207 00:09:52,223 --> 00:09:54,423 Or a soft-pretzel factory or an aquarium. 208 00:09:54,491 --> 00:09:56,325 That's your bag, weirdo. 209 00:09:56,392 --> 00:09:57,493 Hey, let me tell you something. 210 00:09:57,560 --> 00:09:59,595 Those places, they're whimsical 211 00:09:59,663 --> 00:10:01,030 And romantic and fun. 212 00:10:01,098 --> 00:10:03,968 The aquarium is booked with a wedding every weekend until June. 213 00:10:04,036 --> 00:10:06,738 Well, I don't know why. The penguin house smells 214 00:10:06,806 --> 00:10:09,707 Like what I can only assume would be penguin poo. 215 00:10:09,775 --> 00:10:12,708 I did not want them to get married in the penguin house. 216 00:10:12,776 --> 00:10:14,476 I just thought it would be cute 217 00:10:14,544 --> 00:10:16,612 If all the groomsmen took pictures with the penguins, 218 00:10:16,680 --> 00:10:18,447 You know, 'cause they're all wearing tuxedos. 219 00:10:18,515 --> 00:10:20,348 Because the penguins are wearing tuxedos. 220 00:10:20,416 --> 00:10:21,683 You think they're wearing tuxedos? 221 00:10:21,751 --> 00:10:23,551 How is that not whimsical, romantic, and fun? 222 00:10:23,618 --> 00:10:25,852 Oh, I don't know. Why don't you ask your daughter? 223 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:28,320 Oh, wait. You can't, 'cause she went running and screaming 224 00:10:28,388 --> 00:10:29,321 From her psychotic mom. 225 00:10:29,389 --> 00:10:30,923 Her "psychotic" mom. 226 00:10:30,990 --> 00:10:34,626 You know, let's not use hurtful words. I don't... 227 00:10:34,694 --> 00:10:36,295 Yeah, I haven't used any hurtful words. 228 00:10:36,362 --> 00:10:39,065 Yeah, but I can tell you were teein' up a doozy. 229 00:10:42,602 --> 00:10:46,003 Hey, Kenny, we really appreciate you doing our ceremony. 230 00:10:46,072 --> 00:10:47,505 Oh, it was my pleasure. 231 00:10:47,573 --> 00:10:49,307 But before I marry you guys, 232 00:10:49,375 --> 00:10:51,109 Per my online oath, 233 00:10:51,176 --> 00:10:53,944 I gotta offer you 3 45-minute counseling sessions. 234 00:10:54,012 --> 00:10:56,112 But aren't you divorced? 235 00:10:56,180 --> 00:10:59,148 Yes, but that life experience gave me wisdom. 236 00:10:59,216 --> 00:11:00,883 For instance, never tell your woman 237 00:11:00,951 --> 00:11:04,286 That if she thinks she can do better than you, she should. 238 00:11:04,354 --> 00:11:07,022 'cause she can, and she will, 239 00:11:07,089 --> 00:11:08,657 And she did. 240 00:11:10,094 --> 00:11:13,500 Anyway, just go away for a minute. 241 00:11:13,568 --> 00:11:15,937 We're inside of a car together. 242 00:11:16,005 --> 00:11:18,378 Well, well, just don't look at me. 243 00:11:18,446 --> 00:11:19,781 Just turn away. 244 00:11:19,849 --> 00:11:23,719 I'm gonna keep myself together till we get to the rest stop. 245 00:11:25,623 --> 00:11:27,590 Hello. 246 00:11:27,658 --> 00:11:29,191 Hey, Ally. It's mom. 247 00:11:29,259 --> 00:11:30,824 You guys ok? 248 00:11:30,890 --> 00:11:32,423 Yeah, we're fine. 249 00:11:32,491 --> 00:11:36,926 Listen, mom, please do not try and talk me out of this. 250 00:11:36,994 --> 00:11:41,128 No, no, no. No. I'm not trying to talk you out of it. 251 00:11:41,195 --> 00:11:43,997 I just... Ally, I just wanna make sure that you... 252 00:11:44,065 --> 00:11:46,233 This is what you really, really want. 253 00:11:46,300 --> 00:11:48,802 And it is what I really, really want. 254 00:11:48,869 --> 00:11:50,169 Well, it's not what I want! 255 00:11:50,237 --> 00:11:52,938 I didn't spend 18 hours 256 00:11:53,006 --> 00:11:55,373 Pushing you out of me so you could totally bone me 257 00:11:55,441 --> 00:11:57,074 On the most important day of your life! 258 00:11:57,142 --> 00:11:59,476 There you go. That's the sweet honey 259 00:11:59,543 --> 00:12:01,777 That brings the flies back to mama. 260 00:12:01,845 --> 00:12:05,046 Now, I want you to tell me where you are going. 261 00:12:05,114 --> 00:12:08,215 No, mom. I can't tell you where I'm going. 262 00:12:08,283 --> 00:12:11,552 Never a good idea to alienate yourself from your parents. 263 00:12:11,620 --> 00:12:14,422 You know, you might have to live with her again. 264 00:12:14,490 --> 00:12:16,424 Your spouse might change the locks. 265 00:12:16,492 --> 00:12:18,893 And she can, and she will, 266 00:12:18,961 --> 00:12:20,461 And she did. 267 00:12:21,997 --> 00:12:22,864 Who is that? 268 00:12:22,931 --> 00:12:24,164 That's Kenny. 269 00:12:24,232 --> 00:12:25,766 He's performing our ceremony. 270 00:12:25,833 --> 00:12:28,601 Oh, fantastic. Kenny's gonna be there, and I'm not. 271 00:12:28,669 --> 00:12:31,704 2 weeks ago, you thought the guy's name was benny. 272 00:12:31,771 --> 00:12:32,804 Kenny's there? 273 00:12:32,872 --> 00:12:34,272 Yes, Kenny's there. 274 00:12:34,340 --> 00:12:36,340 Let me talk to her. Thank you. 275 00:12:36,408 --> 00:12:37,708 Hello, mother stark. 276 00:12:37,776 --> 00:12:40,611 Listen, I...I know you love us and... 277 00:12:41,613 --> 00:12:42,513 Ok. Wow. That's... 278 00:12:42,580 --> 00:12:44,214 That's some pretty harsh language. 279 00:12:44,281 --> 00:12:47,284 Uh, I'm...I'm gonna assume that...that you don't mean that, 280 00:12:47,352 --> 00:12:49,753 And I'm gonna go ahead and forgive you. 281 00:12:51,189 --> 00:12:54,590 Ok. Wow. That one's gonna be slightly tougher to forgive. 282 00:12:54,658 --> 00:12:57,292 Um... Look, I'm sorry. 283 00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,961 You can yell at me all you want, 284 00:12:59,028 --> 00:13:01,563 But I will not tell you where we're going. 285 00:13:03,699 --> 00:13:05,466 Yello. 286 00:13:05,533 --> 00:13:07,667 What's up, Eddie? 287 00:13:07,735 --> 00:13:09,769 Yeah. We're headed to eagle rock. 288 00:13:09,836 --> 00:13:12,704 All right. Later. 289 00:13:14,807 --> 00:13:15,740 What the... 290 00:13:16,809 --> 00:13:17,742 Sorry about that. 291 00:13:17,810 --> 00:13:20,177 I tell you what. To make up for it, 292 00:13:20,245 --> 00:13:22,179 I'm gonna baptize you both for free. 293 00:13:22,247 --> 00:13:23,480 That cool? All right? 294 00:13:23,548 --> 00:13:24,348 All right. 295 00:13:24,415 --> 00:13:26,916 They're goin' to eagle rock. 296 00:13:26,983 --> 00:13:28,982 The hell they are. 297 00:13:29,050 --> 00:13:31,015 Where are you going? 298 00:13:31,083 --> 00:13:32,582 We are going to find them. 299 00:13:32,650 --> 00:13:34,217 But it's pouring out there. 300 00:13:34,285 --> 00:13:37,653 Oh, shut your pie hole and put on your giant windbreaker. 301 00:13:37,721 --> 00:13:38,754 You know, all of this is your fault. 302 00:13:38,821 --> 00:13:39,887 My fault?! Yes. 303 00:13:39,955 --> 00:13:41,455 You sent them away screaming 304 00:13:41,523 --> 00:13:44,425 Because of your... your binders and your butter sculptures. 305 00:13:44,493 --> 00:13:47,160 Ok, for one thing, they are not butter sculptures. 306 00:13:47,228 --> 00:13:49,295 They are ice sculptures, and they symbolize 307 00:13:49,363 --> 00:13:50,830 The fleeting nature of life. 308 00:13:50,897 --> 00:13:53,665 Yeah, they symbolize hundreds of dollars melting into a puddle. 309 00:13:53,733 --> 00:13:56,934 And listen, why have you turned this into your thing anyway? 310 00:13:57,002 --> 00:13:59,336 Do you really think that silver bamboo chairs 311 00:13:59,404 --> 00:14:01,438 Is gonna give them a better wedding? 312 00:14:01,506 --> 00:14:03,440 Well, you know, that... maybe that is the point. 313 00:14:03,507 --> 00:14:05,842 'cause I always wished that we had a nicer wedding. 314 00:14:05,909 --> 00:14:07,376 I mean, our parents totally cheaped out. 315 00:14:07,444 --> 00:14:10,045 Hey, your parents cheaped out. Mine didn't. 316 00:14:10,112 --> 00:14:12,447 Oh, that's right. Your parents threw us 317 00:14:12,514 --> 00:14:14,281 A fantastic rehearsal picnic. 318 00:14:14,349 --> 00:14:17,450 There were 8 kinds of chips. 8! 319 00:14:19,519 --> 00:14:22,621 All I'm saying is that we had a cheap wedding hall, 320 00:14:22,689 --> 00:14:24,689 The food was disgusting, 321 00:14:24,757 --> 00:14:28,392 And your cousin, Dj Steve, he sucked. 322 00:14:28,460 --> 00:14:30,995 He played private eyes, like, 5 times. 323 00:14:31,063 --> 00:14:32,330 All right. 324 00:14:32,397 --> 00:14:35,833 Now, see, you just gave me 2 honey mustards back to back. 325 00:14:35,900 --> 00:14:38,234 We're supposed to alternate honey mustard with barbecue. 326 00:14:38,302 --> 00:14:40,970 Now my mouth doesn't even know what to feel. 327 00:14:41,037 --> 00:14:45,408 Oh, I'm sorry. I was focused on missing our only daughter's wedding. 328 00:14:45,475 --> 00:14:49,077 I seem to have lost track of your dipping sauce rotation. 329 00:14:49,145 --> 00:14:51,446 All right, well, just please try to keep your head in the game. 330 00:14:51,514 --> 00:14:53,014 Now you're gonna have to do 2 barbecues 331 00:14:53,082 --> 00:14:54,449 Back to back to balance it out now. 332 00:14:54,517 --> 00:14:57,318 How 'bout I shove all these nuggets upr keister? 333 00:14:57,386 --> 00:14:59,620 As long as you alternate honey mustard and barbecue, 334 00:14:59,687 --> 00:15:01,354 I think it'll be fine. 335 00:15:01,422 --> 00:15:02,588 Ok, milkshake me. 336 00:15:06,726 --> 00:15:08,726 So you really hated our wedding, huh? 337 00:15:08,794 --> 00:15:12,895 Babe, the wedding sets the tone for the entire marriage. 338 00:15:12,963 --> 00:15:16,564 I want Ally and Doug o go out into the world 339 00:15:16,632 --> 00:15:19,500 And into their life together in a special way. 340 00:15:19,568 --> 00:15:21,835 That's why I want the nice chairs. 341 00:15:21,903 --> 00:15:25,571 I don't want them to have a $2.00-folding-chair life. 342 00:15:25,639 --> 00:15:26,972 Like we do. 343 00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:29,077 You know, that's not what I meant. 344 00:15:29,145 --> 00:15:30,447 Well, just for the record, 345 00:15:30,514 --> 00:15:31,481 I loved our wedding. 346 00:15:31,549 --> 00:15:32,916 I don't remember the chairs, 347 00:15:32,984 --> 00:15:36,253 I don't remember the food, but you know what I do remember? 348 00:15:36,321 --> 00:15:37,187 Your eyes. 349 00:15:37,255 --> 00:15:40,357 Because I was lookin' at 'em all day. 350 00:15:40,425 --> 00:15:42,259 Really? Yes. 351 00:15:42,327 --> 00:15:43,560 And your cleavage. 352 00:15:43,628 --> 00:15:45,762 Was checkin' that out, too, along with 353 00:15:45,830 --> 00:15:47,096 Rabbi goldstein, who was... 354 00:15:47,164 --> 00:15:48,398 Watch... Watch out! 355 00:15:48,465 --> 00:15:49,666 This weather is crazy. 356 00:15:49,733 --> 00:15:51,734 I can't even see the road. 357 00:15:51,802 --> 00:15:54,236 Well, pull...pull off for a second over there. 358 00:15:54,304 --> 00:15:55,437 Pull over there. 359 00:15:55,505 --> 00:15:56,672 There? 360 00:16:04,312 --> 00:16:08,381 Can't believe we're actually gonna miss Ally getting married. 361 00:16:08,448 --> 00:16:12,183 Why'd I have to be so controlling? 362 00:16:12,251 --> 00:16:14,185 Aw, come on. You're not that bad. 363 00:16:14,253 --> 00:16:15,453 It was my fault, too. 364 00:16:15,521 --> 00:16:18,755 I mean, why'd I have to be such a cheap bastard? 365 00:16:21,591 --> 00:16:23,993 This is the part where you're supposed to go, 366 00:16:24,060 --> 00:16:25,994 "you're not that bad either". 367 00:16:27,763 --> 00:16:29,497 You're not that bad, either. 368 00:16:32,868 --> 00:16:36,570 You know, I may not have loved our wedding, but... 369 00:16:36,637 --> 00:16:39,471 I sure do love the guy I married. 370 00:16:46,144 --> 00:16:48,311 Maybe we should just go home. 371 00:16:49,713 --> 00:16:53,415 No way. Our daughter is getting married on this mountain, 372 00:16:53,483 --> 00:16:57,218 And I will be damned if her mother is not gonna see it happen. 373 00:17:02,396 --> 00:17:06,465 So are you folks in town for the pine cone festival? 374 00:17:06,700 --> 00:17:09,468 I got a 3-pounder comin' in from Ohio. 375 00:17:09,536 --> 00:17:11,036 No, no, no, no, no, no, no. 376 00:17:11,104 --> 00:17:12,370 We're just passin' through. 377 00:17:12,438 --> 00:17:14,605 I'm gonna marry these two up at eagle rock, 378 00:17:14,673 --> 00:17:16,240 You know, once the rain lets up 379 00:17:16,308 --> 00:17:18,942 And the mud dries and the mosquitoes stop drinkin' my blood. 380 00:17:19,010 --> 00:17:20,376 Don't you worry, sweetie. 381 00:17:20,444 --> 00:17:23,412 Once I drain the van and we get back on the road, 382 00:17:23,479 --> 00:17:25,813 You and I'll be married before you know it. 383 00:17:27,916 --> 00:17:29,116 Ally! 384 00:17:29,184 --> 00:17:30,217 Doug. Hi. Oh. Hi. 385 00:17:30,284 --> 00:17:32,885 Mom, dad, what are you guys doing here? 386 00:17:32,953 --> 00:17:34,653 Well, we were looking for you guys, 387 00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:36,822 And we saw Doug's van. Hi. Hi, Doug. 388 00:17:36,890 --> 00:17:37,823 Hey. Listen, uh, hi. 389 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:39,391 I don't care where you get married. 390 00:17:39,458 --> 00:17:41,092 I just wanna be a part of it. 391 00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:42,493 Oh? Yeah. Me, too, 392 00:17:42,561 --> 00:17:45,529 But you know what? I think we should do it after the storm, 393 00:17:45,597 --> 00:17:47,064 Because I'm a magnet for lightning. 394 00:17:47,131 --> 00:17:49,532 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. 395 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:52,602 When it stops raining, we could all hike into the wilderness 396 00:17:52,669 --> 00:17:55,438 And...and stop by eagle lake and have a family cleanse. 397 00:17:55,506 --> 00:17:58,340 Hey, Kenny, only immediate family, though. 398 00:17:58,408 --> 00:18:00,008 I'll get over it. 399 00:18:00,076 --> 00:18:02,176 Uh, then after the cleanse, 400 00:18:02,244 --> 00:18:05,112 It's just a brisk 3-hour hike to base camp 401 00:18:05,180 --> 00:18:08,348 And a quarter-mile vertical free climb up to the summit, 402 00:18:08,416 --> 00:18:10,383 So, uh, we may wanna carbo-load. 403 00:18:10,451 --> 00:18:13,418 Oh, and keep your head on a swivel, 'cause it is bobcat season. All right? 404 00:18:13,486 --> 00:18:16,854 Uh, like I always say, it isn't a stark wedding 405 00:18:16,922 --> 00:18:20,557 Without somebody getting their genitals mauled, huh? 406 00:18:20,625 --> 00:18:23,427 Ok. So, uh, let's do this. 407 00:18:23,494 --> 00:18:24,428 All right. 408 00:18:24,495 --> 00:18:25,428 Ok. All right. 409 00:18:25,496 --> 00:18:26,363 No. 410 00:18:26,430 --> 00:18:28,264 Why? What's wrong? 411 00:18:28,332 --> 00:18:29,332 Everything is wrong! 412 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:31,267 I don't wanna get married on eagle rock. 413 00:18:31,335 --> 00:18:32,768 You don't wanna get married 414 00:18:32,836 --> 00:18:35,104 In the first place that we made love to each other? 415 00:18:35,171 --> 00:18:39,307 No. And what is up with you and doing it outside? 416 00:18:41,343 --> 00:18:42,610 I mean, at first, 417 00:18:42,677 --> 00:18:44,845 I thought it was kind of spontaneous and fun, 418 00:18:44,913 --> 00:18:47,546 But then it was just, like, over and over and over 419 00:18:47,614 --> 00:18:50,116 And over and over and over. 420 00:18:50,183 --> 00:18:54,521 Ok. You're tryin' to tell me that you'd rather make love inside? 421 00:18:54,588 --> 00:18:56,155 What? 422 00:18:56,223 --> 00:18:58,090 Yeah, Doug, I would. 423 00:18:58,158 --> 00:19:00,425 I don't like doing it on rocks, 424 00:19:00,493 --> 00:19:02,960 I don't like doing it on the sand, 425 00:19:03,028 --> 00:19:07,364 And I really don't like doing it on your natural vine hammock. 426 00:19:07,433 --> 00:19:10,267 Ok, so you're tellin' me you're not aroused 427 00:19:10,334 --> 00:19:12,468 By the sensual textures of nature? 428 00:19:12,536 --> 00:19:15,404 Uh, excuse me. I see you have guns here. 429 00:19:15,472 --> 00:19:16,940 Do you sell bullets? 430 00:19:18,209 --> 00:19:21,513 Doug, listen. I just wanna have a normal wedding 431 00:19:21,580 --> 00:19:23,114 With the people I love. 432 00:19:23,182 --> 00:19:26,450 Oh, honey, I'm so happy to hear you say that. 433 00:19:26,518 --> 00:19:29,119 I'm so sorry that I was so pushy. 434 00:19:29,187 --> 00:19:32,856 Yeah, and you know, I'm sorry that I was so cheap 435 00:19:32,923 --> 00:19:34,857 About what it was gonna cost. 436 00:19:34,925 --> 00:19:37,859 I wanna tell you both that I am prepared 437 00:19:37,927 --> 00:19:39,227 Right now to pay 438 00:19:39,295 --> 00:19:42,062 Up to 1,000 dollars. 439 00:19:43,665 --> 00:19:46,603 Thank you, dad. That means a lot to me. 440 00:19:46,671 --> 00:19:50,540 We just... we want you to... we want you to be happy. 441 00:19:50,608 --> 00:19:52,609 That's right. Happily marr... ok. Yeah. 442 00:19:53,911 --> 00:19:56,679 So is the train station still in play? 443 00:19:56,746 --> 00:19:57,713 Ok. Look, honey, 444 00:19:57,781 --> 00:20:00,215 They're not gonna get married on a train. 445 00:20:00,283 --> 00:20:02,650 No, they're not getting married on the train. 446 00:20:02,718 --> 00:20:05,653 They're on the platform. Did you not read the literature? 447 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:07,988 Mom, it's just... it's not who I am. 448 00:20:08,056 --> 00:20:10,090 What, are you too good for a train? 449 00:20:10,157 --> 00:20:11,491 Ok, look... I don't understand. 450 00:20:11,559 --> 00:20:12,992 You've never ridden a train before? 451 00:20:13,060 --> 00:20:15,761 Ok, let's... let's put the lid on the crazy. 452 00:20:15,829 --> 00:20:17,762 We are... we're train people. I don't un... 453 00:20:17,830 --> 00:20:19,564 What is so wrong with the train station?! 454 00:20:19,632 --> 00:20:21,499 I don't get it. No, no, no, no. 455 00:20:22,568 --> 00:20:23,535 Listen. Trains. 456 00:20:23,602 --> 00:20:26,504 It's all gonna be ok. She's not well. 457 00:20:27,540 --> 00:20:29,407 Hey, I just had an interesting 458 00:20:29,474 --> 00:20:31,539 Little, uh, chat with gus over here, 459 00:20:31,607 --> 00:20:34,206 And I'm pretty sure he's gonna kill us. 460 00:20:34,273 --> 00:20:36,107 Let's hit it! 461 00:20:36,175 --> 00:20:37,574 Oh, uh, everybody. 462 00:21:08,034 --> 00:21:11,870 You and I have to get on a different snack schedule. 463 00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:21,000 Sync by fant0m www.addic7ed.com 464 00:21:21,050 --> 00:21:25,600 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0